Travis, we will miss you!

Last night team Hill gathered to say goodbye to the last original member of the team.  Travis worked his last shift yesterday.  He is moving out of state to begin a new chapter in his life.

Travis was the only staff member left from that original meeting in December of 2010.  I wonder if he sensed my desperation that day.  Did they all know that I was at my wits end?  Did he know what was in store for him?  Did he know that he would become a member of our family?

He's been with us for 3 years.  He has seen it all….the poop, the vomit, the wandering, the throw-downs…all of it.  He is the one who can tell the new team members, "You have no idea what it was like in the beginning."  He has also seen the celebrations….the sentences, the chores, trying new things…. all of it.  He's been the recipient of both Nate and Noah's anger and aggressive behavior.  He's seen us through a death, 2 of my surgeries, and many sick boys.  He has been with us on vacation.

Travis is also the record keeper of the group.  He has taken countless pictures of the boys and all the staff members.  He has turned these memories into photo books and calendars that we will always cherish.

I always knew that he would move on.  His course work was finished and he was ready.  Still, when he  told us he was moving, I cried.

We had a great dinner last night.  Many former team members stopped by and we spent so much time talking about the boys.  It is always so fun to hear some of the fun stories again!  There was so much laughter.

I know that even though Nate, Nick, and Noah won't show it, they will miss Travis very much.  Maybe as much as Tim and I will.  I hope he know how he helped all of us, not just the boys.  His being on our team helped change 5 lives for the better.

Dear Santa,

Dear Santa,

Here's my wish list for this year:

1.  A Lopez Waiver for Nate
2.
3.

Actually, that's all I want. Our new insurance company follows the law to the letter, $40,000/ year per child. $40,000 is a lot of money, so it should buy a lot of ABA services , right?

Wrong. It's about 14 hours a week. When you have a 15 year old that can't be left alone, that's not a lot.

Our DMH case manger called me yesterday and said, "Christmas came early!"  I almost started to cry. I thought Nate got the waiver. No such luck. She was calling to tell me that Nick was awarded some funding.  I don't want to sound ungrateful......however, what about Nate?  He is much more severe and needs funding for more help.

So Santa, please help. Nate has come so far in the last three years with the help of 20+ hours of staffing a week. Cutting it back will bring setbacks, not more progress. I wish these people making these decisions would come visit and meet the recipients of the services before they put a cap on services or pass him over because he doesn't appear needy enough.

Please give me a Christmas miracle,

Stacey

Halloween 2013

Halloween is always stressful at our house. Nick is totally into it and Noah usually goes along with it. Nate, however, has always been the issue. He doesn't like to dress up and he really doesn't understand trick or treating. If you open your front door for Nate, he's going to walk in your house. So, I the past, Nate has been the problem at Halloween. This Halloween, was very different.

Tim had a football game on Halloween. So, we were already down one adult. I took Nick to a friend's house and he trick or treated with them. This left me at home to hand out candy and Nate and Noah with their staff.

Both boys put on their costumes with no problem...even Nate. This was encouraging. Since the weather was so bad, they decided to go trick or treating at the mall. I thought this would be better for Nate, since this eliminated the whole going in people's houses. It was so crowded at the mall that staff decided to take the boys to Krispy Kreme for their free donuts and then home to see the neighbors.

When Noah goes to the mall, he wants to ride the escalator and go to the play place. Well, neither of those things happened on Halloween. It was so crowded that they just turned around to leave. Noah was not having any of that. He dropped to the ground and started screaming. For Noah's staff member, it was her first experience with a Noah fit.  I am really glad that she was not with him alone. Nate's staff member had plenty of experience with a Noah fit apparently, this one lasted 25 minutes. They said they were surprised that mall security did not get involved.

When he quieted down, they were able to get him in the car. They still stopped at Krispy Kreme. Nate went in and got his donut and Noah sat in the car. He was not going to get a treat to reinforce his behavior at the mall. When they got home, Nate went trick or treating at the neighbor's houses.  He said "trick or treat" and did not try to enter their homes. While Nate did this, Noah took a bath and went straight to bed. He was exhausted after his meltdown. Nate proudly showed me his candy and had another donut.

If you had told me that Nate would have a great Halloween, I would have bet against you. It just shows that in an autism house, nothing is a sure thing.

Noah update

We had Noah's IEP a few weeks ago. It lasted 2 hours. It's so funny, in my building, the kids don't receive as many services, so the IEPs last about 45 minutes. I think 2 hours is Noah's shortest IEP so far.

Noah's behavior has greatly improved, both at home and in school. He still struggles is school when a classmate is having a meltdown. Noah is an empathetic crier. If you are crying, he will cry with you. I guess he thinks that no one should meltdown alone. They are now trying to get Noah out of the rio when a classmate is starting to rev up.

The OT is concerned with Noah's handwriting. She has not seen much improvement over the past year. She asked about typing, but I said no. I think we need to keep up with the handwriting. I'm afraid that if we start typing, he will never write. He also needs to have a signature when begets older.   Our home OT will help get the staff on the same page with handwriting. This way he can also practice at home.   I was also pleasantly surprised when the school OT wanted to increase his OT minutes.

The classroom teacher wants to up his academic goals. She wants to move Noah into the Dolce 1st grade words.  She also wants to start counting by 5's and 10's. When we get these things implemented in his home therapy, he will master these in no time. All the therapists agreed that he learns so quickly.

It seems that he makes great strides every day.  I am anxious to see where we are in another year!

We went to a movie...

Yesterday, the AMC theater in Creve Coeur had a Sensory Free movie.  This means that they didn't turn the lights down all the way and didn't turn the sound all the way up.  They also didn't show any previews so the movie length was shorter.

Katie and I took Nate and Noah.  I was a little nervous.  I had yet to sit through a whole movie with the boys.  Unfortunately, AMC did not let Katie in for free.  We had Noah's letter from Behavior Intervention Services, but no such luck.  Most places will allow the staff in for free.  This may not seem like a big deal....a few dollars here and there, but when you have to take an extra person with you everywhere, it gets expensive.  The manager did photocopy the letter and will contact the corporate office.  Let's hope that next time staff will be let in at no charge.

It was so nice!    The auditorium was not quiet.  The kids were doing what they had to do to get through the movie.  Many of them were covering their ears, flapping, making sounds, and getting up and pacing.  One teen stood in the aisle the entire time.  No one asked him to sit down.  No one stared at any of the kids.  No one asked any of the kids to be quiet.  

We went through a couple refills of our large popcorn.  I think the highlight for my boys was the popcorn.  I am not sure if they can follow a plot longer than an episode of Thomas the Tank Engine.  Noah asked to use the bathroom twice and was getting a little antsy the last 20 minutes.  Nate sat in his seat the whole time.  He verbalized when he noticed things on the screen...."boat" and "cheeseburger".

My kids were with their peers.  They were not a minority.  They were able to be themselves and so were all the other kids in the theater.  I did not notice any parents looking anxious and nervous because they were afraid of how others would react to their children.  The kids were comfortable.  The parents were comfortable.  It was a good outing.

My campaign platform

One of  my students told me today that I should run for office. "Why?" I asked. He replied, "Because you are one of the most convincing people I know."  I thought about it for a second and then told my class that I know what my platform would be.......

More Family Restrooms everywhere!

Nate, Noah, Katie (Noah's staff), and I were at the zoo yesterday. Nate had to use the restroom.  I couldn't find a family restroom, only a men's or women's. I even asked an employee.... She couldn't tell me where one was located.

This happens a lot. If I take Nate out without a male staff member, we face the bathroom dilemma. Nate is 15. He is too big to take into the women's restroom. However, I am not comfortable letting him go into the men's restroom alone. He doesn't talk. He couldn't tell me if anything inappropriate happened.

So, I take him with me into the women's restroom and try to ignore all the stares. I try to speak to Nate while we are in the restroom. I figure that if they hear me talking to Nate, they will understand that he is developmentally delayed and won't think he's a pervert. They don't realize that while it is uncomfortable for them, it's also uncomfortable for us. I don't want strangers to know that Nate still needs help in the bathroom.  Just because he has autism does not mean he doesn't have a right to privacy or his dignity.

Not my life....

I went to a young child's birthday party yesterday.  OK, that sounds like I stayed for a while.....I made it 20 minutes.....

I went by myself...first mistake.  They have a dog, so I couldn't take Nate.  I get so tired of having to explain that no, my 15 year old son is not a pervert because petting a dog gives him an erection.  So, if he had gone, it would have taken all my energy to keep him away from the dog.  I couldn't take Noah...there are so many reasons that I couldn't take Noah...  The way that people usually look at him or me when he's with me is just too hard to take.  So, I went by myself.

I made it 20 minutes.  I was sitting there watching all these little kids...perfectly developing kids..and I realized This Is Not My Life.  I have nothing in common with these people.  It's so hard to watch them play and talk and interact with each other and their parents.  This Is Not My Life....it was my dream, but it's not my life.  My life involves medication and juggling all the therapies, not play dates.

So I left...and cried.  Some days I'm just not that strong.

Nate has a resume

St. Louis ARC has a great summer program, Teens in Motion. This was Nate's second year attending.   He had such a good time and acquired some good work experience. 

Every day had both a volunteering opportunity and a social opportunity. He volunteered at nine different locations where he learned and used many skills. He did various activities from folding pizza boxes to making cards for sick children to doing light landscaping.  They even made baked goods and sold them at a bake sale. 

After they volunteered in the morning, they spent the afternoon having fun throughout St. Louis.  They went to the zoo, rode Metrolink, jumped at Skyzone, and went swimming. By doing these fun activities Nate was able to increase his independence. He had to order his own food at restaurants and pay for all his recreation activities. 

He had such a great summer!  It was very easy to get him up in the mornings when I told him he was going to camp. He was always ready to leave on time and had his backpack, lunch, and wallet.  He came home with his own résumé!

We'll sit out the fireworks

It's 9:20 pm on July 4th and Nate and Noah are in bed. It's not because they aren't patriotic, it's just that the way most Americans celebrate the 4th is just too hard.

Our family always has a celebration.  We used to all go, but it was always a miserable day for Nate and Noah. We were in a house they weren't used to and there were many new people. Both of these factors are difficult. I always struggle with the boys around new people. Their behavior can be unpredictable and not everyone is open and understanding. I usually spend most of the time worrying about their behavior and trying to explain it to new people. They are stressed, I am stressed.  Not a good combination.

The local carnivals are also difficult. They are so crowded.  Also, they don't allow the boys to jump to the front of the line, so waiting to ride a ride is tough. Put that on top of a hot, crowded group of people and they aren't understanding.

The fireworks are a nightmare. They are so loud that the boys just cover their ears and try to leave. We have even tried to watch them from the car.....didn't work.

So the best solution for us is simple... I stay home with Nate and Noah and Tim takes Nick to the picnic with his family.

Father's Day

I am always talking about how the boys' diagnoses have affected me.  Sometimes I forget that they have also affected Tim.

I have never seen a father-son relationship like Tim and his dad's.  The mutual love, respect, and admiration is so beautiful to see.  Tim will always cherish the memories he has from playing football for his dad and then being able to coach with his dad.  The player-coach relationship was able to become a coach-coach relationship.  I am sure that when we found out Nate was a boy, Tim was already planning for this to happen again.  I think that each time we received the diagnosis, Tim's dream of his son's playing football for him became less and less of a reality.

I know that Tim loves his sons with all his heart and accepts them for who they are.  I also know that his heart aches a bit when Nate and Noah don't pay attention when football is on tv.  They also could never handle the noise and crowd at a Ram's football game.  Nate and Noah are both built to play sports, but never will.  I don't think the pain would be as great if they at least could understand the game.  If they were capable, Tim would never force them to play or watch football, that would be their choice.  Tim would support them in whatever sport or activity they were involved in. However, the fact that they don't even have a choice is what is so hard.

Luckily, Tim is having this relationship with Nick.  Nick plays football on a team and Tim helps coach.  Nick loves to play football, but struggles to sit and watch a full game.  I hope that someday Nick cherishes all the memories he will have playing football for his dad the same way that Tim does.  I will always be sorry that Tim will not have this with Nate and Noah.

Nate's Wisdom Teeth

Going to the dentist is not easy....Nate has put Tim, the dentist, and two dental hygienists to the floor just because the dentist needed to look at his teeth.  Every 2 years, the dentist sends Nate to Children's Hospital where they put him under general anesthesia so he can have his teeth cleaned and x- rayed.  This past November came the words I was hoping to not hear..."Nate needs his wisdom teeth cut out this spring."

I called the oral surgeon who was recommended and tried to set up a consultation.  The receptionist wouldn't listen to me and kept telling me to just bring in Nate and his x-rays and they would do it in the office.  I couldn't get him to understand our dilemma.  I called the scheduling person at the dentist's office and she called.  Suddenly, the receptionist from the oral surgeon's office was telling me that it would be done at Children's Hospital and the surgeon would like a consultation appointment before hand.....I tried to tell him...

Nate and I met with the oral surgeon.  He had two good throw downs before we got into the office.  One was in the parking garage and the other in the lobby of the hospital....it wasn't Children's Hospital so we received many strange looks.  Nate was VERY UNCOOPERATIVE during the appointment.  The surgeon agreed that it would be unsafe for Nate to go home after having his teeth removed.  His plan was to heavily sedate Nate, put in a breathing tube, and stick him in the ICU for a day or two.

It sounded like a good plan.  However, the insurance company said no way.  When the surgeon's office called to have it pre-approved, they kept saying he could go home.  I called and was able to get it pushed through and approved.  I actually told the lady on the phone that if they weren't going to allow Nate to stay in the hospital then the people who make this decision need to come to my house and help me care for him.  She didn't like this very much.  However, three days later, it was approved.

Last Friday morning, we arrived at the hospital at 6:15 am.  Nate was the first surgery scheduled.  Luckily, we had the same nurse that we had in November.  She remembered Nate and that helped.  Nate was fine until it was time to put on the gown.  Tim had to suit up and go back into the operating room.  He had to lay across Nate on the operating table so they could give him the gas through the mask.  They could not put in the IV's until he was asleep.

The surgery went well and he was then taken to the PICU.  They were very conservative with the medications and Nate started to wake up twice.  This involved 6 to 8 people to hold him down and they had put on the arm restraints.  The medication that worked best was the propofol, yes the one that Michael Jackson used.  This medication required an hourly check in, so the machine beeped every hour.... I was allowed to sleep in the room....the alarm on the machine went off every hour.....

He slept all day Friday and through the night.  The nurses moved him every two hours so he would not get bedsores.  He had to be catherized twice so he would not get a bladder infection.  While he was sleeping, the nurses were able to change the gauze in his mouth without being bitten or kicked.  He did not pull out the stitches.  The ice packs actually stayed on his face.  None of this would have happened at home (dumb insurance company).

Because people under 18 can't be on the propofol for more than 24 hours, he had to be woken up Saturday morning.  The doctor did a great job of making sure Nate was breathing on his own, but not fully awake, when they pulled out the tube.  He called it "the art of medicine."  When the tube came out, the only medicines were to calm him, not make him sleep.  As soon as he woke up he started to get agitated.  "It's time to go home!"  He was required to stay in the hospital for 6 hours after he was woken up.  

It was a long 6 hours.  They did take out the IV's as soon as possible and he was able to put on his clothes.  He must have told me "hospital is all done" or "home" a thousand times in those six hours.  He also cried and was very agitated.  We left the hospital around 4:00 Saturday afternoon.  I was very humbled when the nurse told me that they rarely have patients leave the PICU walking out.

It was a rough 36 hours.  However, Nate was the healthiest patient on the floor.  He only had one doctor and one nurse, not a team.  He also did not have goals listed on the white board outside his door.  He was not in the PICU long enough for us to need to put up pictures or decorate the room.  People did not have to gown up to see him.  I did not need to call the family to the hospital to meet with his team of doctors which led to most of the family crying.  Sure, the autism is rough, but he is healthy.

What I want for Mother's Day...

I know what I want for Mother's Day.  I don't want flowers, jewelry, or a new outfit.  I want the autism to go away for one day.

I want Nate, Nick, and Noah to be typical kids....just for a day....every year on Mother's Day would be great.  I would like to know what it's like to parent "typical" kids.  I'm sure I could do it...it can't be harder than what I already know....

I want Nate and Noah to talk to me.  Really talk to me...not reciting lines from their favorite episode of "Elmo's World" or Clifford".  I want to tell them the story of how Tim and I met.  I want to tell them how happy I was on my wedding day.  I want to tell them how I loved each of them the moment I found out I was pregnant.  I want to tell them how Tim was so afraid to hold them when they were first born...he said they were so small!

I want them to tell me if they're happy.  I want them to tell me what they like and don't like.  Does Nate like it when we call him "Naters?"  Why doesn't Noah like macaroni and cheese?  He's never even touched it.  Do they know they are different?  If so, does it bother them?

I want to be able to have a conversation with them about their futures.  I want them to know that I have a plan.  I want them to know that the decision for them to not live at home forever was difficult, but I believe it's for the best.  I want them to know that they will always have each other (and Nick).  I want them to know that I will never stop fighting for them.

Embrace it....Own it....

If your child is developmentally delayed, embrace it.  Don't try to cover it up, accept it.  After you accept it, own it.  That is who he/she is.  Now your job is to make sure that they get the best and most help they can.

If you have health insurance, call and ask about your home health benefits.  With these benefits, the boys are receiving Speech Therapy and Occupational Therapy in home and without a co-pay.  All it took was a prescription from the pediatrician.  The office faxed it over to a company I found in our area and the therapy company took care of the rest.  I found out about this when I called to ask about my benefits for the Autism Bill.  I just happened to ask the customer service representative "what else do I have?"  It may only provide with 20 visits a calendar year, but that's perfect for the 12 weeks of summer when they are only in school part time.

I also use our Department of Mental Health case manager.  Every state has this is some form or another.  Look up Department of Mental Health in your state.  The wheels in the state machine move very slowly, but I have received help there.  You just need to call now.....not in a few months.....There will be a lot of paperwork to fill out....I usually fill it out with a carton of ice cream and a spoon (no bowl needed).  Just do it...you are a taxpayer...your kids deserve the benefits.

Find activities in your area for special kids.  We are lucky to have one in St. Louis, TASK (Team Activities for Special Kids).  They offer a variety of sporting and leisure activities.  So does ARC (Association for Retarded Citizens)...I know they need a better name.  Through these organizations, my boys play soccer, t-ball, bowling, kickball, attend cooking class, and attend overnight camp all with kids just like them.  For once, they are not the minority.  They are with their peers.  Also, if your child attends a camp for typical kids, the camp may be required to provide staffing to help your child be successful.  We found this through the Recreation Council.  This enabled Nick to attend a camp when he was younger.

Also, look into the Americans With Disabilities Act.  Because of this, my boys pay admission to many places, but their care giver does not.  I remember the neurologist telling us to take the boys out, "They will gain something from every outing."  This allows us to send them to places that charge admission, but helps financially by not paying for the staff member.  I usually call ahead to places and when I mention ADA, they are more than happy to help us.

Finally, there is no shame in your child attending a school for special kids.  It may seem scary at first, but they can be great places.  Sending Nate and Noah to the self-contained school in our area is the best thing we ever did.  They are in school with their peers.  They do not stand out...everyone in that school is a special kid.  They do great things.  There comes a time when you need to decide what is more important, life skills or academic knowledge?  Tim and I have always tried to be realistic about the boys.  They don't need to know the Presidents of the United States, but they do need to be able to operate a microwave.  In s special school, these life skills are very important and taught in a wide variety of ways.  The boys are seeing kids that their lives will be intertwined with, whether it's at an outside activity or further down the road at a group living facility.  We wanted to immerse them in their community.

I know it's a big job.....trust me I know.  Don't worry, you are stronger than you know......and you can always find someone who has already walked down this road.

Noah loves to snuggle

Noah woke up this morning, went to the bathroom, and came straight into my bed.  He snuggled right into me and pulled up the covers over his head.  He loves to snuggle.

Nate and Nick did not enjoy snuggle time.  Nick tolerated it better than Nate, but neither of them enjoyed it the way Noah does.  Nate actually did not like to be snuggled.  When he would cry, hugging never consoled him.  It often upset him ever more.  Even to this day, he does not like to be touched.  He will tolerate a hug, but that is all...he tolerates it.  Nick snuggled for a while as a toddler, but quickly outgrew it.

Noah's sensory dial is very different than his brothers'.  He touches everything and everyone.  If you are sitting on the couch, he will come in and sit rightnexttoyou.  He starts by sitting next to you, then he's leaning on you, and eventually he is on top of you.  He has always craved that input.  He responds well when the staff brushes him and does the joint compressions.  When he is laying with us in bed, he often maneuvers himself so he is under us.  He really likes the weight on him.

When Noah comes in the morning to snuggle, I know it's a sensory need and not an emotional need.  However, the mommy in me prefers to think it's emotional.......

World Autism Awareness Day

I've been very reflective today.  Not that I don't think about autism all the time.......Usually, when I think about autism, I'm bitter....and mad.  Today I am grateful.......

Not grateful for the autism......I'm not crazy....but grateful for the the help and support that the boys receive.  We wouldn't be where we are today without all that help.  We are lucky that we live in a city that has resources to help the boys.

 I feel sorry for the families who live in small towns and don't have good resources.  It must be so frustrating for those moms that know what help their child needs, but can't find it within a 30 mile radius of their house.  Maybe Autism Speaks needs to create an outreach program to help these families.

I am grateful that Nate and Noah attend a school for special kids.  It's such an amazing place!  I feel sorry for the kids whose parents insist on keeping in the mainstream school when there are other avenues to consider.  Regular high school or middle school is not always the best placement for a child who will not be able to live independently.  I do not understand why some parents think that memorizing the President's of the United States is a better use of their child's time than learning life skills.  I know it's more expensive to educate a child in come special schools, but what happened to doing what's best for kids?  What will happen to that child when they turn 18?  I'm afraid the parents will not have done what is best for their child's quality of life.

I hope that soon the Autism Bill becomes a federal law.  It's a shame that families in Missouri who have a federal health insurance policy and not a Missouri policy do not get the benefits.  I think it should be available to all families in the United States, regardless of their insurance carrier.

We are so lucky to have Team Hill!  We have 11 people who care about the boys and work very hard to help them reach their goals.  Yes, the autism sucks, but the people who have helped us throughout the years have been amazing.  We are lucky to have them.  Let's hope that all families affected by autism have such a team.

Another hoop

A few weeks ago, our DMH case manager decided that to put Nate on the waiting list for the Lopez Waiver (the same one Noah has).  This decision was made due to Nate's increased aggression and his hours being cut by the insurance company (that's a whole other issue).

In order to apply for the Lopez Waiver, I must apply for Medicaid (again) and be denied (again).  Has anyone seen the paperwork??  Why can't they just pull up our telephone number and see that we were already denied once so we sure will be denied again??  This is just ridiculous!  I am so tired of filling out paperwork.

I don't understand why people make things so difficult for some of us who already deal with difficult every day.  How about making things easier?  Just come to the house, watch one of Nate's meltdowns, and make the decision.  Someone must think that I sit around on my ass all day and eat chocolates.  I surly have a lot of free time to fill out a four page application for something that I will be denied.  

I am filling out the paperwork......ugh......

By the way, hula hoops are the only type of hoop I want to deal with.

Nate is 15

Nate is 15.  We have had his diagnosis for 13 years. 13 years ago I started to mourn the loss of the child I would never have. 

Nate should have his driver's permit. 
Nate has not had a first kiss.
Nate has never had a sleepover.
Nate has never played a team sport.
Nate has never gone to the mall with his friends.
Nate has never had his heart broken.
Nate has never ridden a bike.

I am still mourning. I am still angry. I am still jealous of all my friends who have typical children. 

PJHS

A couple of weeks ago, I visited my previous place of employment.  It was so nice to visit with the friends that I haven't seen in a very long time!

As I was driving home, I realized that these people helped me get through getting Nate's diagnosis and the first 15 months of therapy.  They were so patient as I cried and wondered how we would get through this.  They offered many hugs and words of encouragement.  They listened while I described every therapy and cheered for every bit of progress, no matter how small.  

It was a difficult decision to leave PJHS.  However, working closer to home was best for my kids.  I think of these friends often and hope they know how grateful I am for their support and friendship.  I don't think I would have survived that first year without them.

2 Year Anniversary......

Today marks the 2nd anniversary of having Behavior Intervention Services in the house.  The time has gone by so quickly!  What a difference two years makes!  The boys are making progress every day.  The new people on the team can't believe stories from 2 years ago.

Nate's most noticeable progress is in the area of independence.  He now makes his bed, makes a microwavable breakfast, gets dressed, brushes his teeth, washes his face, and loads/unloads the dishwasher independently.  Two years ago, he could not do any of these things.  He is almost showering independently, he still needs some verbal prompts to get moving....otherwise he just stands under the warm water.  We are still working on his speed.  Nate moves at his own speed....never feels the need to hurry for anything.  He will now sit through a movie at the theater.  That could not happen before BIS.  They are still working on Nate paying for items and improving his skills in the community.  Don't get me wrong, he is still so behind other kids his age, but his progress is amazing.

Noah......wow...... Two years ago, he was naked and aggressive.  He pulled me to the floor in the bathroom at Macy's (not my best moment).  He freak out whenever someone turned on the automatic hand dryer or if the automatic flusher went off.  He never kept his clothes on...at home or in public.  In order to brush his teeth, you had to lay him on my bed and straddle him and hope he didn't hurt you.  He was also eating and/or spreading feces.  He could not sit at the table for a meal.  He would take one bite and fall to the floor or run around the table.  All of these things have improved.  I don't believe it.  He is not the same child.  He listens (most of the time), he will let you brush his teeth, he sits at the table and waits for 3 minutes, he stays dressed, and he is potty trained.  This growth helps me believe that he will be able to live in an assisted facility with Nate.  

Nick's behavior in public and his people skills are improving.  He is still a little quirky, but learns better behaviors through practice. He is starting to understand how to have a conversation with another person, instead of just talking at the person.  He has 2 friends and I would like that number to grow.  He is also becoming more independent at home and out in the community.  

All of our lives have improved with the Autism Bill and Behavior Intervention Services.  Our team members have always been very nice and truly want to help the boys.  With their help, Tim and I were able to take 2 short trips alone.....what a luxury!  I don't feel so helpless or alone.  I can't wait to see where we are January 2, 2014!