What I want for Mother's Day...

I know what I want for Mother's Day.  I don't want flowers, jewelry, or a new outfit.  I want the autism to go away for one day.

I want Nate, Nick, and Noah to be typical kids....just for a day....every year on Mother's Day would be great.  I would like to know what it's like to parent "typical" kids.  I'm sure I could do it...it can't be harder than what I already know....

I want Nate and Noah to talk to me.  Really talk to me...not reciting lines from their favorite episode of "Elmo's World" or Clifford".  I want to tell them the story of how Tim and I met.  I want to tell them how happy I was on my wedding day.  I want to tell them how I loved each of them the moment I found out I was pregnant.  I want to tell them how Tim was so afraid to hold them when they were first born...he said they were so small!

I want them to tell me if they're happy.  I want them to tell me what they like and don't like.  Does Nate like it when we call him "Naters?"  Why doesn't Noah like macaroni and cheese?  He's never even touched it.  Do they know they are different?  If so, does it bother them?

I want to be able to have a conversation with them about their futures.  I want them to know that I have a plan.  I want them to know that the decision for them to not live at home forever was difficult, but I believe it's for the best.  I want them to know that they will always have each other (and Nick).  I want them to know that I will never stop fighting for them.