Halloween is always stressful at our house. Nick is totally into it and Noah usually goes along with it. Nate, however, has always been the issue. He doesn't like to dress up and he really doesn't understand trick or treating. If you open your front door for Nate, he's going to walk in your house. So, I the past, Nate has been the problem at Halloween. This Halloween, was very different.
Tim had a football game on Halloween. So, we were already down one adult. I took Nick to a friend's house and he trick or treated with them. This left me at home to hand out candy and Nate and Noah with their staff.
Both boys put on their costumes with no problem...even Nate. This was encouraging. Since the weather was so bad, they decided to go trick or treating at the mall. I thought this would be better for Nate, since this eliminated the whole going in people's houses. It was so crowded at the mall that staff decided to take the boys to Krispy Kreme for their free donuts and then home to see the neighbors.
When Noah goes to the mall, he wants to ride the escalator and go to the play place. Well, neither of those things happened on Halloween. It was so crowded that they just turned around to leave. Noah was not having any of that. He dropped to the ground and started screaming. For Noah's staff member, it was her first experience with a Noah fit. I am really glad that she was not with him alone. Nate's staff member had plenty of experience with a Noah fit apparently, this one lasted 25 minutes. They said they were surprised that mall security did not get involved.
When he quieted down, they were able to get him in the car. They still stopped at Krispy Kreme. Nate went in and got his donut and Noah sat in the car. He was not going to get a treat to reinforce his behavior at the mall. When they got home, Nate went trick or treating at the neighbor's houses. He said "trick or treat" and did not try to enter their homes. While Nate did this, Noah took a bath and went straight to bed. He was exhausted after his meltdown. Nate proudly showed me his candy and had another donut.
If you had told me that Nate would have a great Halloween, I would have bet against you. It just shows that in an autism house, nothing is a sure thing.
Tuesday, November 5, 2013
Noah update
We had Noah's IEP a few weeks ago. It lasted 2 hours. It's so funny, in my building, the kids don't receive as many services, so the IEPs last about 45 minutes. I think 2 hours is Noah's shortest IEP so far.
Noah's behavior has greatly improved, both at home and in school. He still struggles is school when a classmate is having a meltdown. Noah is an empathetic crier. If you are crying, he will cry with you. I guess he thinks that no one should meltdown alone. They are now trying to get Noah out of the rio when a classmate is starting to rev up.
The OT is concerned with Noah's handwriting. She has not seen much improvement over the past year. She asked about typing, but I said no. I think we need to keep up with the handwriting. I'm afraid that if we start typing, he will never write. He also needs to have a signature when begets older. Our home OT will help get the staff on the same page with handwriting. This way he can also practice at home. I was also pleasantly surprised when the school OT wanted to increase his OT minutes.
The classroom teacher wants to up his academic goals. She wants to move Noah into the Dolce 1st grade words. She also wants to start counting by 5's and 10's. When we get these things implemented in his home therapy, he will master these in no time. All the therapists agreed that he learns so quickly.
It seems that he makes great strides every day. I am anxious to see where we are in another year!
Noah's behavior has greatly improved, both at home and in school. He still struggles is school when a classmate is having a meltdown. Noah is an empathetic crier. If you are crying, he will cry with you. I guess he thinks that no one should meltdown alone. They are now trying to get Noah out of the rio when a classmate is starting to rev up.
The OT is concerned with Noah's handwriting. She has not seen much improvement over the past year. She asked about typing, but I said no. I think we need to keep up with the handwriting. I'm afraid that if we start typing, he will never write. He also needs to have a signature when begets older. Our home OT will help get the staff on the same page with handwriting. This way he can also practice at home. I was also pleasantly surprised when the school OT wanted to increase his OT minutes.
The classroom teacher wants to up his academic goals. She wants to move Noah into the Dolce 1st grade words. She also wants to start counting by 5's and 10's. When we get these things implemented in his home therapy, he will master these in no time. All the therapists agreed that he learns so quickly.
It seems that he makes great strides every day. I am anxious to see where we are in another year!
Sunday, October 6, 2013
We went to a movie...
Yesterday, the AMC theater in Creve Coeur had a Sensory Free movie. This means that they didn't turn the lights down all the way and didn't turn the sound all the way up. They also didn't show any previews so the movie length was shorter.
Katie and I took Nate and Noah. I was a little nervous. I had yet to sit through a whole movie with the boys. Unfortunately, AMC did not let Katie in for free. We had Noah's letter from Behavior Intervention Services, but no such luck. Most places will allow the staff in for free. This may not seem like a big deal....a few dollars here and there, but when you have to take an extra person with you everywhere, it gets expensive. The manager did photocopy the letter and will contact the corporate office. Let's hope that next time staff will be let in at no charge.
It was so nice! The auditorium was not quiet. The kids were doing what they had to do to get through the movie. Many of them were covering their ears, flapping, making sounds, and getting up and pacing. One teen stood in the aisle the entire time. No one asked him to sit down. No one stared at any of the kids. No one asked any of the kids to be quiet.
We went through a couple refills of our large popcorn. I think the highlight for my boys was the popcorn. I am not sure if they can follow a plot longer than an episode of Thomas the Tank Engine. Noah asked to use the bathroom twice and was getting a little antsy the last 20 minutes. Nate sat in his seat the whole time. He verbalized when he noticed things on the screen...."boat" and "cheeseburger".
My kids were with their peers. They were not a minority. They were able to be themselves and so were all the other kids in the theater. I did not notice any parents looking anxious and nervous because they were afraid of how others would react to their children. The kids were comfortable. The parents were comfortable. It was a good outing.
Katie and I took Nate and Noah. I was a little nervous. I had yet to sit through a whole movie with the boys. Unfortunately, AMC did not let Katie in for free. We had Noah's letter from Behavior Intervention Services, but no such luck. Most places will allow the staff in for free. This may not seem like a big deal....a few dollars here and there, but when you have to take an extra person with you everywhere, it gets expensive. The manager did photocopy the letter and will contact the corporate office. Let's hope that next time staff will be let in at no charge.
It was so nice! The auditorium was not quiet. The kids were doing what they had to do to get through the movie. Many of them were covering their ears, flapping, making sounds, and getting up and pacing. One teen stood in the aisle the entire time. No one asked him to sit down. No one stared at any of the kids. No one asked any of the kids to be quiet.
We went through a couple refills of our large popcorn. I think the highlight for my boys was the popcorn. I am not sure if they can follow a plot longer than an episode of Thomas the Tank Engine. Noah asked to use the bathroom twice and was getting a little antsy the last 20 minutes. Nate sat in his seat the whole time. He verbalized when he noticed things on the screen...."boat" and "cheeseburger".
My kids were with their peers. They were not a minority. They were able to be themselves and so were all the other kids in the theater. I did not notice any parents looking anxious and nervous because they were afraid of how others would react to their children. The kids were comfortable. The parents were comfortable. It was a good outing.
Monday, September 16, 2013
My campaign platform
One of my students told me today that I should run for office. "Why?" I asked. He replied, "Because you are one of the most convincing people I know." I thought about it for a second and then told my class that I know what my platform would be.......
More Family Restrooms everywhere!
Nate, Noah, Katie (Noah's staff), and I were at the zoo yesterday. Nate had to use the restroom. I couldn't find a family restroom, only a men's or women's. I even asked an employee.... She couldn't tell me where one was located.
This happens a lot. If I take Nate out without a male staff member, we face the bathroom dilemma. Nate is 15. He is too big to take into the women's restroom. However, I am not comfortable letting him go into the men's restroom alone. He doesn't talk. He couldn't tell me if anything inappropriate happened.
So, I take him with me into the women's restroom and try to ignore all the stares. I try to speak to Nate while we are in the restroom. I figure that if they hear me talking to Nate, they will understand that he is developmentally delayed and won't think he's a pervert. They don't realize that while it is uncomfortable for them, it's also uncomfortable for us. I don't want strangers to know that Nate still needs help in the bathroom. Just because he has autism does not mean he doesn't have a right to privacy or his dignity.
More Family Restrooms everywhere!
Nate, Noah, Katie (Noah's staff), and I were at the zoo yesterday. Nate had to use the restroom. I couldn't find a family restroom, only a men's or women's. I even asked an employee.... She couldn't tell me where one was located.
This happens a lot. If I take Nate out without a male staff member, we face the bathroom dilemma. Nate is 15. He is too big to take into the women's restroom. However, I am not comfortable letting him go into the men's restroom alone. He doesn't talk. He couldn't tell me if anything inappropriate happened.
So, I take him with me into the women's restroom and try to ignore all the stares. I try to speak to Nate while we are in the restroom. I figure that if they hear me talking to Nate, they will understand that he is developmentally delayed and won't think he's a pervert. They don't realize that while it is uncomfortable for them, it's also uncomfortable for us. I don't want strangers to know that Nate still needs help in the bathroom. Just because he has autism does not mean he doesn't have a right to privacy or his dignity.
Monday, August 19, 2013
Not my life....
I went to a young child's birthday party yesterday. OK, that sounds like I stayed for a while.....I made it 20 minutes.....
I went by myself...first mistake. They have a dog, so I couldn't take Nate. I get so tired of having to explain that no, my 15 year old son is not a pervert because petting a dog gives him an erection. So, if he had gone, it would have taken all my energy to keep him away from the dog. I couldn't take Noah...there are so many reasons that I couldn't take Noah... The way that people usually look at him or me when he's with me is just too hard to take. So, I went by myself.
I made it 20 minutes. I was sitting there watching all these little kids...perfectly developing kids..and I realized This Is Not My Life. I have nothing in common with these people. It's so hard to watch them play and talk and interact with each other and their parents. This Is Not My Life....it was my dream, but it's not my life. My life involves medication and juggling all the therapies, not play dates.
So I left...and cried. Some days I'm just not that strong.
I went by myself...first mistake. They have a dog, so I couldn't take Nate. I get so tired of having to explain that no, my 15 year old son is not a pervert because petting a dog gives him an erection. So, if he had gone, it would have taken all my energy to keep him away from the dog. I couldn't take Noah...there are so many reasons that I couldn't take Noah... The way that people usually look at him or me when he's with me is just too hard to take. So, I went by myself.
I made it 20 minutes. I was sitting there watching all these little kids...perfectly developing kids..and I realized This Is Not My Life. I have nothing in common with these people. It's so hard to watch them play and talk and interact with each other and their parents. This Is Not My Life....it was my dream, but it's not my life. My life involves medication and juggling all the therapies, not play dates.
So I left...and cried. Some days I'm just not that strong.
Friday, July 26, 2013
Nate has a resume
St. Louis ARC has a great summer program, Teens in Motion. This was Nate's second year attending. He had such a good time and acquired some good work experience.
Every day had both a volunteering opportunity and a social opportunity. He volunteered at nine different locations where he learned and used many skills. He did various activities from folding pizza boxes to making cards for sick children to doing light landscaping. They even made baked goods and sold them at a bake sale.
After they volunteered in the morning, they spent the afternoon having fun throughout St. Louis. They went to the zoo, rode Metrolink, jumped at Skyzone, and went swimming. By doing these fun activities Nate was able to increase his independence. He had to order his own food at restaurants and pay for all his recreation activities.
He had such a great summer! It was very easy to get him up in the mornings when I told him he was going to camp. He was always ready to leave on time and had his backpack, lunch, and wallet. He came home with his own résumé!
Every day had both a volunteering opportunity and a social opportunity. He volunteered at nine different locations where he learned and used many skills. He did various activities from folding pizza boxes to making cards for sick children to doing light landscaping. They even made baked goods and sold them at a bake sale.
After they volunteered in the morning, they spent the afternoon having fun throughout St. Louis. They went to the zoo, rode Metrolink, jumped at Skyzone, and went swimming. By doing these fun activities Nate was able to increase his independence. He had to order his own food at restaurants and pay for all his recreation activities.
He had such a great summer! It was very easy to get him up in the mornings when I told him he was going to camp. He was always ready to leave on time and had his backpack, lunch, and wallet. He came home with his own résumé!
Thursday, July 4, 2013
We'll sit out the fireworks
It's 9:20 pm on July 4th and Nate and Noah are in bed. It's not because they aren't patriotic, it's just that the way most Americans celebrate the 4th is just too hard.
Our family always has a celebration. We used to all go, but it was always a miserable day for Nate and Noah. We were in a house they weren't used to and there were many new people. Both of these factors are difficult. I always struggle with the boys around new people. Their behavior can be unpredictable and not everyone is open and understanding. I usually spend most of the time worrying about their behavior and trying to explain it to new people. They are stressed, I am stressed. Not a good combination.
The local carnivals are also difficult. They are so crowded. Also, they don't allow the boys to jump to the front of the line, so waiting to ride a ride is tough. Put that on top of a hot, crowded group of people and they aren't understanding.
The fireworks are a nightmare. They are so loud that the boys just cover their ears and try to leave. We have even tried to watch them from the car.....didn't work.
So the best solution for us is simple... I stay home with Nate and Noah and Tim takes Nick to the picnic with his family.
Our family always has a celebration. We used to all go, but it was always a miserable day for Nate and Noah. We were in a house they weren't used to and there were many new people. Both of these factors are difficult. I always struggle with the boys around new people. Their behavior can be unpredictable and not everyone is open and understanding. I usually spend most of the time worrying about their behavior and trying to explain it to new people. They are stressed, I am stressed. Not a good combination.
The local carnivals are also difficult. They are so crowded. Also, they don't allow the boys to jump to the front of the line, so waiting to ride a ride is tough. Put that on top of a hot, crowded group of people and they aren't understanding.
The fireworks are a nightmare. They are so loud that the boys just cover their ears and try to leave. We have even tried to watch them from the car.....didn't work.
So the best solution for us is simple... I stay home with Nate and Noah and Tim takes Nick to the picnic with his family.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)